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Use Resistance To Unearth Your Fears Then Show Her The Door.

April 20, 2011

 “The more important a call or action is to our soul’s evolution, the more Resistance we will feel toward pursuing it.” Steven Pressfield via the always-illuminating Danielle LaPorte.

Oh, I know this to be true Steven. My best friend Maria and I are currently in the throes of resistance.

How do I explain resistance? It’s different than stuck; it’s active, not passive. It’s a flat-out refusal. It’s the call to rage against the light and the admonishment to not go gently into that good night.

If stuck is quicksand, pulling you under inch-by-inch, then resistance is a linebacker tackling you and pushing you down. Over and over.

This morning Danielle’s How To Resist Success landed in our inboxes and we both felt like we’d been called out. And Steven Pressfield? Damn him and his insight!

So here we are: me closing out my Wednesday and Maria just starting hers facing the fact that we can’t resist forever.

Without realizing it, we’ve been trying to wrap our heads around resistance for weeks. Why do we feel it? What is it really about? Today, we dug deep.

Turns out, it’s very simple. Maria and I (and maybe you) share some common fears.

We are afraid to look foolish. We are afraid to fail. We’re afraid we might unknowingly look like frauds. We’re afraid of losing faith.

Are you wondering what’s fear got to do with it? Who needs a dream when a dream can be broken? (Yes, I am channeling Tina Turner.)

Having a calling is exciting but terrifying. If you feel compelled to do something, chances are you’re going to evangelize the hell out of that mission.

Once you put yourself on shout, there’s no going back. If I talk big about what I’m going to do next, then I can’t pretend like it was some small, inconsequential, meaningless task later.

So if I fail, chances are it’s going to be public. And public failure is an invitation for shame and embarrassment.

This leads me to wonder: is resistance an act of love? Is it our subconscious trying to protect us from potential hurt?

If so, then should we deal with Resistance the same way we’d deal with well-intentioned but misguided friends or family? The ones we thank for their love and support while gently reinforcing that everything’s gonna be ok.

What I’m dying to say is: “Hey Resistance! Thanks but no thanks. I’m willing to take a chance. I’m all in.”

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2 Comments leave one →
  1. April 22, 2011 10:08 pm

    This is beautiful! I love the conclusion and I’m so down with channeling Tina Turner! I have to seriously reflect on resistance as a well-meaning friend/family member. My resistance has roots as deep and strong as a 100 year old oak tree thriving on unspoiled land 😀 Seriously, as I read this I was in a bit of a reflective mode and realized that I’m digging my feet in and screaming NOOOOO while also fooling myself into thinking I’m doing something like what I’m called to do! (That’s a whole nother post/comment) Public humiliation is one thing…I’ve made some messes in my day and I’m not really up for another one for all to see. Resistance, like that dear friend, is daying “Jennifer, play it cool. Pop your collar like the cool kids and just fall in inconspicuous line.” The trouble is…following the advice of my resistance isn’t working. I’m still working this out. This post is so on point and on time 🙂

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  1. All-Or-Nothing Is Whack. It’s Your Resistance Talking. Stop Listening. « An American Girl In Cambodia

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